Episode 59: The Second Confession #2
Late at night.
Yohan was on his way to the Fervache mansion, riding a carriage after wrapping up his work.
To be exact, he hadn’t completely finished his tasks. He had postponed some for later because he simply couldn’t focus.
Rudella’s face, gazing up at him sorrowfully and desperately as snowflakes fell on her, kept surfacing in his mind.
Her sincerity left him feeling burdened, yet it also struck a strange chord within him. She was ready to give up everything for him.
But accepting her sacrifice would mean turning his back on his relationship with Francia.
Even so, he couldn’t forget her expression. It was impossible to erase from his mind. He’d never felt like this before, so he didn’t know how to handle it.
“What is this…?”
It was hard for Yohan to accept that he was starting to feel drawn to Rudella, someone he had always kept at arm’s length.
Francia had been the first person he had ever opened his heart to, across both his past and present lives. He had never experienced such a desperate emotion before, which only added to his confusion.
To be honest… it felt good. His heart raced, and his emotions stirred. His face flushed so red he felt he might never experience such feelings again.
It would be fair to say he was halfway swayed.
‘…This is driving me crazy.’
Though nothing was decided yet and there was no need to overthink it, if Rudella managed to win him over, he would end up being involved with two women.
In this world, it wasn’t unusual for men of high status to practice polygamy, but Yohan didn’t hold a particularly high position.
Although he had the backing of the Fervache ducal family, he was merely a son-in-law, and the highest title he’d earned by his own efforts was as a Special Class Mage in the Bureau.
“What a disgraceful sight.”
Yohan realized he was being indecisive and wavering, and even he found the sight of himself pathetic. No, he couldn’t stand it.
On top of that, he was selfish, hesitating to make a clean decision despite having Francia. His ambiguous attitude frustrated him even more.
Frowning, Yohan turned his gaze to the window. Snow was falling so heavily it looked like a scene from a painting.
The roads had frozen over and become slippery, preventing the carriage from picking up speed.
“…This is going to take a while.”
The Bureau’s office and the Fervache estate were quite far apart. Given the estate’s vast grounds, it was located on the outskirts of the city.
Though the trip back would take some time, Yohan didn’t mind. He needed this time to organize his thoughts before meeting Francia.
“There’s so much to think about.”
From closing the rift of the demonic lair to Rudella’s situation, and even the Crown Prince who was quietly scheming against him—Yohan’s plate was full.
If Francia were to allow his relationship with Rudella—though that seemed unlikely—Yohan’s burdens would grow even heavier.
“What can I do? I just have to give it my all.”
The consequences were his to bear because the decisions were his own.
Yohan didn’t want to run away from that.
Of course, he didn’t know if he would succeed. But since he had started, his philosophy was to do his absolute best.
***
At that moment, Francia stood by the window in Yohan’s room, gazing toward the main gate, waiting for him to arrive.
The sight of the pure white snow falling brought back memories of a time now gone. His words from back then still lingered in her heart.
“If I can’t remember, then you just have to remember for me.”
That was why Francia had sought him out the moment she returned to the past. It was the reason she came to have genuine feelings for him.
“Fufu…”
Remembering that day, Francia smiled faintly. At the time, she had felt such unbearable pain, wishing for everything to end as quickly as possible.
“Who would have thought things would turn out like this?”
Meeting Yohan had set her plans into motion, as if the gears of a clock had perfectly aligned.
Of course, aside from meeting him, Francia’s plans were progressing smoothly.
The first step was eliminating the men who were obsessively clinging to her.
Cassis Lenokhonen had sunk on his own before she even needed to do anything. His brute behavior, no different from her past life, came as no surprise.
Next was Crown Prince Fedelian Rozino. He wasn’t as easy to deal with, making him a headache. Collecting evidence against him wasn’t going well either.
Still, time would take care of it. Behind his mask, Fedelian was a ruthless criminal who would inevitably get caught by his own actions someday.
‘Then there’s the Master of the Azure Tower and the Archbishop of the Holy Kingdom…’
Fortunately, there was no connection with either of them in this life, so she didn’t need to worry about them.
Next was her second plan:
To greatly increase Yohan’s value.
‘It’s happening faster than I anticipated, but it’s proceeding as planned.’
The war with Sanburk had been an unexpected variable. It was a new event caused by Yohan’s involvement.
However, this variable turned out to be positive, opening up a significant breakthrough in her plans.
Yohan had gained the ability to close the rifts of the demonic lair.
Though she only knew a fraction of this world’s secrets, she had a vague understanding of them.
During the time she was fleeing after the destruction of the Fervache household at the hands of those men, she had once visited the library of a Transcendence mage.
That was where she obtained ‘the grimoire of regression.’
Of course, the grimoire wasn’t the only thing she gained there.
‘If someone with purifying energy like me exists, closing the rifts of demonic lairs should be possible.’
While healers were exceedingly rare, Francia was called a master of healing magic thanks to her purifying nature.
The Transcendence mage had told her that if magic imbued with purifying energy was poured into the rifts of the demonic lairs, they could be closed.
In other words, the reason Yohan could close the rifts of demonic lair was that Francia’s purifying energy had seeped into him.
The sole reason she had Yohan take on the task instead of doing it herself was straightforward: she lacked the vast mana reserves that Yohan had.
Closing the rifts required both immense mana and purifying energy.
Thus, Yohan had gained the ability to close the fissures.
The key condition for purifying energy to seep into another person was frequent interaction with them.
Not just simple kisses but deep, shared moments of connection…
“Ahem.”
Recalling her shared moments with Yohan, Francia felt her face flush and coughed lightly to conceal her emotions.
Anyway…
While she had known from Yohan’s mana blade in the previous life that his mana reserves were immense, she hadn’t anticipated its high purity.
In any case, this unexpected discovery accelerated the process of infusing her purifying energy into him, which was undoubtedly good news for Francia.
‘Perhaps Yohan and I were destined to be connected from the beginning.’
Francia smiled at the thought. At this point, there was no doubt in her mind. A firm conviction had taken root deep within her heart.
‘And pretending to be ignorant seems to have worked well.’
Dropping subtle hints while acting clueless about the possibility of closing the rifts had been perfect.
Though it would have been easier to explain everything from the beginning… the Transcendence mage had warned her never to let anyone know about her regression.
Rather than explaining too much and raising Yohan’s suspicions, it was better to feign ignorance and provide him with only the bare essentials.
‘Just a little more.’
Clenching her fist, Francia swallowed hard. Her anticipation was palpable, and she felt her throat tighten with excitement.
“Lady Francia, Lord Harsen has arrived.”
As Francia was lost in thought, a servant entered to inform her of Yohan’s arrival.
She rose from her seat, a soft smile on her lips.
***
When Yohan returned to the mansion, Francia greeted him with a bright smile.
“You came back earlier than I thought?”
“Ah.”
Yohan averted his gaze and gave an awkward smile. He couldn’t bring himself to meet her eyes.
“…I postponed my work until later.”
“Oh, why?”
“I couldn’t focus at all…”
“Hmm?”
Francia noticed something strange but chose not to press him. Yohan looked exhausted.
“You must be tired from working late. I’ll have a meal prepared for you, so rest for now.”
“Yes.”
Yohan smiled faintly and headed upstairs. Seeing Francia made his thoughts a tangled mess. She didn’t know about his relationship with Rudella.
If Rudella revealed the truth first, the betrayal Francia would feel would be immeasurable.
‘I have to tell her.’
He needed to explain everything—what happened with Rudella, why things turned out this way, and what he wanted to do about it.
After a light wash in the bathroom, Yohan changed clothes and went to the dining room. A warm soup was prepared on the table, perfect for the cold winter.
“Enjoy your meal!”
As he sat down, Francia, seated across from him, picked up her utensils. The quiet dining room was filled only with the sounds of cutlery clinking.
Not wanting to miss the opportunity, Yohan spoke first.
“Francia.”
“Yes?”
“There’s something important I need to tell you.”
“What is it?”
Francia set down her utensils and looked at Yohan.
“Well…”
Yohan hesitated briefly. He couldn’t predict how she would react once he said it.
But he had to say it.
“Lady Bismarck came to see me.”
“Her?”
“…She confessed her feelings to me.”
“What are you talking about…?”
Francia blinked in confusion, tilting her head.
“Lady Bismarck confessed her love to me. She said she’s severing ties with her family and breaking off her engagement to the crown prince.”
“Wait, wait. Hold on.”
Francia’s eyes widened as she waved her hand to stop him. Yohan paused.
“What are you even saying all of a sudden? I’m honestly really shocked…”
Francia couldn’t follow what he was saying. Something felt off, but a love confession? From Rudella Bismarck, of all people?
“Why would she…?”
She unconsciously held her breath. For a moment, it felt like the air had been knocked out of her lungs.
Fragments of the past flashed through her mind.
Rudella Bismarck was always perfect and composed. For her to break off her engagement with the crown prince? It was unbelievable.
And to fall for Yohan, of all people…?
“When exactly did this happen? It’s not today, is it?”
“It was today, but it’s happened before as well.”
“What…”
As Francia struggled to process the situation, Yohan continued explaining.
“What happened was─”
He told Francia everything—from when he first met Rudella during an escort mission, to the time they were stranded in a cave after a bridge collapsed, and all the events that followed, including Rudella’s personal circumstances.
“Oh my God.”
Francia covered her mouth in disbelief. Her crimson eyes quivered intensely. Her breathing grew ragged.
Silence filled the room. Francia felt a storm of complex emotions swirling within her—anger mixed with an inexplicable sense of unease.
Her mind grew hazy as if she were losing her grasp on reality.
“…Yohan .”
Though her tone was calm, her emotions were in turmoil.
“What do you want to do?”
Francia asked, her expression hardening. Her voice trembled slightly.
“I want to help Lady Bismarck.”
“Because she changed because of you?”
“Yes.”
Yohan’s face was firm as his deep blue eyes gazed steadily at Francia.
“If I turn my back on her, if I don’t help her, Lady Bismarck might die.”
This was the most significant reason.
He didn’t want to see someone who had shown him genuine emotions and had changed because of him lose their life.
“And after helping her?”
Francia pressed on, her face cold and unyielding.
“…I don’t want to hurt her.”
Her gaze was piercing as she asked again.
“Is that pity and compassion?”
Her voice was calm, but an undeniable undercurrent of unease flowed through it.
“That’s how it started, but now it’s different.”
“…So, you’re saying you’ve grown feelings for her?”
Francia’s voice trembled as her crimson eyes seemed to pierce through Yohan.
“Yes.”
Yohan spoke honestly.
He wanted to show that his feelings were sincere—for someone who had made the bold decision to abandon everything as a noble and as the future Crown Princess for him.
A woman so foolish yet resolute, who, unable to suppress her longing, had sought him out even at the risk of humiliation.
A woman who, despite her fear of rejection, had stood there quietly, meeting his gaze with sorrowful eyes.
Someone who had confessed that her feelings weren’t born of mere appearances, but because she admired Yohan Harsen as a person.
He couldn’t help but feel something for her.
“…I’m really confused and overwhelmed right now.”
“I understand.”
“I don’t even know how to process all of this.”
Francia sighed deeply, closing her eyes to conceal their trembling.
A surge of emotions boiled within her—jealousy, unease, and conflict between trust and doubt shook her core.
Yohan simply waited silently for her to speak.
“…But I’ll talk to her. If Lady Bismarck is as confident about persuading me as you say, she must have something valuable to offer us.”
To be honest, she wasn’t thrilled about it, but she had no intention of denying Yohan’s feelings outright.
After all, she had no right to.
In a way, she had been the one to claim Yohan for herself, forcing responsibility upon him.
So, if there ever came a time when he truly desired someone else, She was willing to accept the possibility of polygamy.
On the condition that she would always remain his first.
“Yohan, will you respect whatever decision I make?”
When Francia asked this in a low, steady voice, Yohan answered without hesitation.
“Of course.”
“Even if I refuse?”
“Yes.”
“…Then that’s enough.”
Francia let out a bitter smile, nodding slowly.
“I know better than anyone that your feelings for me won’t waver.”
For now, she decided to have a conversation with Lady Bismarck.
As the former Crown Princess-to-be, Lady Bismarck’s support could undoubtedly make things smoother for them in the future.