Episode 51: The Heroines Stole My Regression

Episode 51: The Night Before (4)

Executing something isn’t difficult if you put your mind to it?

As long as you have the will, execution isn’t hard?

That’s nothing but nonsense.

—Crunch.

The 758th death.

The moment I woke up, I rolled out of the trunk. My face hit the ground, and for a brief moment, I couldn’t breathe.

I clenched the dirt with my fingertips.

I tore up some innocent weeds as I forced myself to stand.

From here on, the task was simple—a routine ingrained in me after hundreds of deaths.

Before Park Gwangchul hears the noise and comes to check, I have to sprint downhill toward the battlefield.

Then, I’ll grab one of the three Apostles at random, fight as best as I can, and die.

Though honestly, ‘fighting well’ might be an overstatement.

Endless deaths and resurrections continued without an end in sight.

At least now, I could see the attacks coming.

If I focused only on dodging, it felt like I could manage something.

But the real problem was attacking.

Without a Fragment, no matter how hard I struck, I couldn’t pierce through their exoskeletons.

In the end, I had to admit that this brute-force method had its limits.

But it wasn’t as if I had gained nothing.

I had plenty of time, so I had to try something else.

So, I decided to observe their battles.

However, the level of combat was on an entirely different scale—too fast for my eyes to even track.

Analyzing their movements with my intuition alone was no easy task.

In an hour, their battle would end.

One Apostle would charge in with a grin, only to be forced back after losing a wing to the unexpectedly fierce resistance of the Vanquisher.

Then, the three Apostles would attack simultaneously.

From that point on, the outcome was obvious.

Once again, the battlefield crumbled.

Once again, death repeated itself.

Watching my comrades die over and over, analyzing each and every death…

This wasn’t something a human should be doing.

At some point, I felt something trickling down my cheek.

I wiped my face.

Tears.

Without even realizing it, I had started crying.

[『Serene Mirror, Still Water (明鏡止水)』 evolves into 『Selfless Trance (無我之境)』.]

The state of mind forged through countless deaths and regressions…

It was close to complete self-forgetfulness.

The battle ended.

I rose to my feet and walked toward the battlefield.

I emptied my mind.

At some point, death had stopped being frightening.

“Who’s that?”

An Apostle, who had just killed the old man, asked the one beside him.

There was no response.

I didn’t even answer. I just took my stance, fought, and died.

I had tried everything.

At one point, I even urged them to run away.

Yet, for some reason, the Apostles immediately saw through it.

I defined this as the world’s restraining force.

There was no way forward except the predetermined path.

And then, there was this one time—

“Hey, you fucking bastards!!!”

All three Apostles turned to look at me at once.

I shouted.

“Just once—let me stab you! It won’t even leave a scratch anyway, right? Just once, let me stab you!”

The Apostles didn’t even bother to sneer.

They simply drew their greatswords.

Except for one—the Apostle with no facial features.

The one with a pure white face chuckled.

Then, after whispering something to the others, he slowly approached me.

“Would you like to try?”

Blagh.

It was a face I recognized.

He spread his arms wide.

He took no defensive stance—just stood there, waiting for my attack.

I knew he would go along with it.

I concentrated all the mana I could into the tip of my spear.

Then, with all my strength, I thrust it forward.

—Crack…

“Haha, not bad.”

Crack.

As soon as I woke up, I was engulfed in contemplation.

Even an all-out attack had failed. The amount of mana I was born with was insufficient. I had to make a decision.

Reverse Heaven (易天).

The last resort. I had no choice but to use it now. By forcibly reversing the flow of my mana and meridians, I could amplify my output.

The reason I hesitated was simple—once I committed to Reversal of Heaven, my “growth path” would be permanently fixed. There was no turning back. Reversing the flow and then trying to set it right again was simply impossible.

I took a deep breath. And then—I forcibly reversed my mana.

In an instant, it felt like every vein in my body was burning.

The energy coursing beneath my skin rampaged in the opposite direction.

It felt like my organs were being torn apart. Like my bones were shattering. Like every nerve was set ablaze.

Puah!

I coughed up blood and died.

912th death.

1100th life.

At last, I succeeded in Reversal of Heaven.

[You have acquired『Reverse Heaven Divine Art』—with limitations.]

However, there were limitations.

After countless deaths, I finally realized something—my frail body couldn’t fully withstand Reverse Heaven.

Simply reversing my mana flow wasn’t enough.

Reverse Heaven was a technique that explosively amplified output by completely inverting the flow of mana.

But my weak body couldn’t endure it.

Perhaps if I drank Iano’s elixir, things would be different. But in the short term, increasing my mana quality was impossible.

So instead of strengthening my frail body, I focused on refining my mastery of Reversal of Heaven.

1104th death.

I died coughing up blood.

1492nd death.

My heart exploded.

1671st death.

My blood vessels burned away before the Apostle could even land a hit. My body broke apart first.

2001st death.

The conclusion was simple.

I needed to perfectly control my body so it could withstand Reverse Heaven.

3910th death.

Failure. My body still couldn’t adapt.

4399th death.

My body was slowly adjusting to Reverse Heaven.

I devised an immediate response method after output regulation.

4529th death.

Ten seconds.

Maximum duration: ten seconds.

I realized I had to end things within that time.

At some point, I had lost count of how many times I had died.

A battle with the Vanquishers.

Before I knew it, I had learned to fight alongside them.

But being able to fight and being able to win were two different things.

The entire squad had been wiped out.

Once again, I was going to follow them into death.

Puhk!

Just as that thought crossed my mind—

A fist pierced through my stomach.

It had missed my heart, but I could feel my organs rupturing.

And yet, I felt no pain. Not because the pain wasn’t there—

But because I had grown so accustomed to it that my senses had dulled.

I had died more times than I could count.

At this point, what did dying even mean? Just like always, if I died, I would return.

So, there was only one thing left for me to do.

Kill.

I gripped the Apostle’s arm—the one that had impaled my stomach—tightly.

With my other hand, I drew my spear.

Then, I activated Reversal of Heaven and surged my mana to its peak.

Kill.

The Apostle’s eyes wavered.

But it was already too late.

The mana of Reversal of Heaven gathered at the tip of my spear, condensing with immense force. An overwhelming surge of energy erupted—far greater than anything before.

Ten seconds.

The raging mana bared its fangs, waiting only to tear through evil.

The Apostle tried to pull his arm away.

But the muscles pierced through my stomach held him in place, and with my other hand, I gripped his arm tightly.

The Apostle frowned. He swung his free hand and struck my face.

Bang!!

My head snapped to the side. But I felt nothing.

And then—

The spear I had thrust forward finally pierced through his shoulder.

Crunch!

“Khrrrgh…!”

At last, I had wounded him. He groaned in pain.

Had this ever happened before?

Not once, not even a single time, had I seen them show pain.

I wasn’t sure.

My arms trembled. Just a little more. Just a little—

Boom!

But the Apostle was not alone.

Another Apostle, who had been waiting nearby, struck me with immense force and sent me flying.

“You idiot, what are you doing?”

The Apostle with the spear impaled in his shoulder let out a hollow laugh. He pulled the spear out and threw it back at me. His eyes burned with rage.

His entire body tensed, as if he was about to pounce.

But—

“Leave him.”

Another Apostle reached out and stopped him.

“He’s already as good as dead. We need to go. We’ve wasted too much time.”

Only then did I realize—the sun was setting.

It was the longest battle I had ever fought.

The Apostles left, leaving blood-soaked footprints behind them.

It was only then that I felt my strength drain away.

Unconsciously, I bent forward.

What…?

The Apostles had vanished, yet I was still alive.

The Vanquishers had been annihilated.

But for the first time—I saw hope.

For the first time, I had changed something with my own hands.

For the first time, the battlefield that had been nothing but an endless cycle of death had shifted, even if just slightly.

The countless deaths I had lost count of had finally led to a result.

Blood poured from my body.

I felt my organs rupturing, my muscles tearing apart.

“Heh… Heheheh….”

I was about to die. But I laughed.

I finally understood.

No matter how long it took, no matter how many times I had to die—

I would kill them all.

And—

I would bring everyone back.

My breathing grew shallow. I couldn’t feel pain, but I could sense my lungs reaching their limit.

Now—it was time to go save my comrades.

I grabbed my spear and drove it straight into my throat.

Puah!

I was going back. Again. To the base point.

Wait for me. I will kill you all.

However—

When I opened my eyes again—

“Ugh… H-huh…?”

The battlefield.

The exact spot where I had just died.

My body was still riddled with holes, and blood continued to flow from my wounds.

For a moment, I couldn’t understand.

Am I… not dead yet?

I picked up my spear once more and stabbed my own throat.

Thud.

I opened my eyes again.

Still—

I was there.

A terrible realization struck me.

I was certain I had died. Then why…?

That was when I heard a voice in the distance.

“Medical support incoming!!!”

It was the Association’s emergency rescue team.

My breath caught in my throat.

And I realized.

I hurriedly stabbed my neck again.

Splurt!

I opened my eyes once more.

And yet, I was still in the same place.

A single theory screamed inside my head.

I desperately tried to ignore it. Crawling on the ground, I struggled to move away from the approaching rescue team.

“Hurry! Heal him, now!!”

Someone shouted.

And then—

A sacred energy seeped into my body.

“N-no….”

One possibility.

The Apostles had retreated.

At the moment they left, I, Jung Haein, was still alive.

And the system had deemed the situation as resolved.

The Vanquishers may have been annihilated, but the system didn’t care.

A new save point had been set.

“AAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!”

A scream tore from my throat.

With blood-soaked hands, I clutched my head.

I pulled at my hair and rolled across the ground.

Hundreds of deaths. Thousands of deaths.

I had endured them all.

And finally, I thought I had done it.

I was certain I had changed something.

But the hope I had seen—

Had been nothing more than the last embers of their dying flames.

“AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!”

Even after that, I raised my spear again and again, stabbing my own throat.

Thud!

I opened my eyes.

Thud!

I opened my eyes.

But no matter how many times I tried—

I never returned to that moment.

It was all over.

I—

In the end, I—

Had saved no one.

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