Episode 9: A face genius is good at soccer

Episode 9: The Crazy Girl (4)

Damn it.

This is seriously unfair.

What did I do wrong?

It’s that crazy woman who’s at fault, not me! I’m innocent!!

No way... Am I really getting falsely accused...?

As I headed toward the Starbucks the crazy woman mentioned, I realized I couldn’t just go there unprepared.

‘Sure, the world has gotten cruel, and a woman’s tears can be taken as evidence, but if I can clearly prove my innocence, shouldn’t I be able to defend myself?’

But how do I secure evidence of my innocence?

I searched on my smartphone and found that recording is the most common method.

This is it!

As I quickly downloaded a recording app, a sudden realization hit me.

"Ah, shit! Come to think of it, I should’ve just recorded that phone call!!”

Why do I always regret things afterward?

Tormented by yet another late realization, I searched online just in case.

‘Call recording... Ah, fuck, why can’t my phone automatically record calls?’

As expected, it was already too late.

I guess I need to upgrade to the latest model every year... Speaking of which, what's the latest phone out now? Should I go with Apple or Samsung this time...?

While I was lost in thought, my phone vibrated.

—“wd”

Damn, look at the attitude oozing from this text.

No effort whatsoever. What the hell is “wd”? No manners at all, this girl.

I quickly pocketed my phone and entered the Starbucks.

Of course, it’s Starbucks. Even in the middle of a weekday, the place is always packed. What do these people even do? Why are they hanging out here in the middle of the day?

As I grumbled while watching couples flirt with each other, I noticed something strange about the atmosphere.

People seemed distracted by something else…?

Following their gazes, I saw a goddess.

Her long, sleek black hair contrasted with her pale, petite face. Her features were so distinct and well-balanced that even from a distance, her beauty radiated like a beacon.

‘Wow. She’s truly stunning.’

She was dressed simply in a plain white T-shirt and jeans, but as they say, "simple is best," and she looked like she had stepped right out of a magazine.

Her figure-hugging white T-shirt barely contained her prominent chest, and it was a sight to behold.

And those long legs crossed so casually, with slim ankles and calves leading up to those perfectly shaped thighs... Oh wow.

It’s said that the true beauty standard is a white T-shirt and jeans, and this was proof that our ancestors were right.

She’s incredibly beautiful.

Beauty at that level is rare, and it’s no wonder people can’t stop glancing at her.

There’s an aura about her. Her presence is on a different level.

‘I’m so jealous. If I could be with a woman like that just once, I’d die happy.’

After reluctantly tearing my eyes away from her, I glanced around.

But oddly enough, now people were looking at me.

What is it? Why are they looking at me?

...Sigh. Pretending not to notice is getting old.

The power of my 95 attractiveness score, once again.

Being so handsome is exhausting.

Trying to keep a cool expression, I scanned the Starbucks, but that crazy woman was nowhere to be seen. Did that psycho lie? Damn it, I was fuming, but then the goddess in the corner started waving at me.

What’s this? Did she fall for my 95 attractiveness?

To think I’ve even managed to charm a goddess… The power of 95 attractiveness is terrifying!

“Ahem. Hello there.”

I tried to sound casual as I walked over and greeted her in a deep voice, but she looked confused.

“Didn’t you just wave at me? If you have some time—”

“What the hell? Are you stupid?”

“Huh…?”

“…Are you serious? You really don’t recognize me?”

Looking irritated, she brushed her hair back.

“Holy shit... You’re that perverted chick.”

“Perve...”

She gave a crooked smile and gestured for me to sit down.

“Who are you calling a pervert? And what’s with that? You call me a pervert, but when I wave at you, you look like you’re ready to die from happiness. Grinning like an idiot.”

“……”

“Hey. Go get me some coffee.”

Thud. She tossed the buzzer onto the table.

The humiliation made my fists clench involuntarily.

“Don’t want to? Well then... What should I do with this picture~?”

“Ah, fuck! Fine, I’ll get it!”

Snatching the buzzer, I shot to my feet, only to hear a small laugh.

“…??”

As I turned around, there she was, sitting arrogantly with her legs crossed, arms folded, and motioning with her chin.

"Aren't you going?"

"Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm going, I'm going."

What a rude girl.

When I got to the counter, I realized she had only ordered for herself. Wow.

I ordered a drink for myself too, and by the time I brought them back, she was already complaining that I was late.

"Why are you so slow? You can't even pick up an order properly? I ordered it to drink while it was still hot, but now it's all cold."

"Stop whining and just drink it. It's still hot, you know?"

"I wanted to drink it the moment it came out!"

"Whatever. What difference does it make whether you drink it now or later?"

"This is why I can't talk to people who don't understand coffee."

"Oh, really? Then how about you stop talking to a coffee-ignorant person like me and just let me go?"

"...I don't want that."

Damn, she's really annoying.

She took a sip of the coffee I brought her and then set it down.

After all that talk about coffee, she only took one sip and stopped.

See? She should've just ordered a sweet cocoa instead.

Laughing at her, I leisurely sipped my cocoa.

Mmm, sweet.

As I sipped my cocoa with elegance, she sat across from me, legs crossed, arms folded, staring at me.

Why is she glaring?

"Hey."

"What."

"Let me have some."

"Some of what?"

"That. What you're drinking."

"Why?"

"I want to see what you ordered."

"I don't want to."

I teased her by taking another sip, and she waved her phone at me.

"...It's just cocoa."

"Then let me have some."

"But why?"

"I want to taste it."

"Why? Just order your own."

"...Never mind, just let me have it."

Jeez, her temper is really something.

Fine, I’m done with it anyway.

I handed her the half-finished cocoa, and she stared at it for a moment before taking a sip.

"Tastes good."

"Yeah, you can have the rest."

"Thanks. I will."

So I sat there, watching her sip on the cocoa for a while.

She drank it so slowly and carefully that it took her a long time to finish. When she finally did, she suddenly said something out of the blue.

"Give me your phone."

"Out of nowhere? Why?"

"Just give it to me."

Whatever, it's already got a cracked screen; she won’t steal it.

I pulled it out of my pocket and placed it on the table.

She grabbed it quickly and frowned.

"What's the pattern?"

"I don't want to tell you."

"......"

"...It's in the shape of an 'L'."

Her glare was a bit sharp.

"Hey."

"Oh, what now."

"What's this?"

"What's what?"

"'Evidence of innocence? Call recording? Oh, look at this, a recording app?'"

...Oh, right.

Damn, why is she snooping through my phone?

"Seriously, you're such a—"

She cut me off with a small laugh as her fingers continued to move across my phone screen.

What the hell? What is she doing?

Why is she messing around with my phone!?

Is this how it feels to trust someone else with your phone?

‘Was there something I shouldn't have on my phone? What have I done with it?’

As I started to feel a sudden wave of anxiety, thinking hard about what I might have forgotten,

"Hmm."

After a long while, the crazy girl finally handed my phone back.

Then she propped her chin on the table and stared at me with a strange expression.

What is it now?

"Are you a virgin?"

"Ffft!!"

What the hell is she saying?!

"What... what kind of nonsense is that?"

"Are you a virgin or not?"

"Of course not. Do I look like one to you?"

"But in your texts, you were asking when you'd lose your virginity."

"..."

Damn, I remember now.

The message I sent to a friend a few days ago...

"You crazy girl! Why were you reading my texts?!"

"Ahem."

She smirked at me.

"You're cute."

What an out-of-the-blue comment.

"Seriously, why are you so cute?"

"C-cute?"

"Wanna be mine?"

"What kind of crazy talk is that?"

"You know, I don't like guys in real life. They're unfaithful, dirty, obsessed with girls, always hitting on someone. Why can't real-life guys be like the prince in a comic?"

What is she even talking about?

I stared at her, dumbfounded.

"But strangely... I keep thinking about you. Why is that? Why are you so cute?"

"Uh, are you feeling okay? Like, in the head...?"

"Hey, why don't you be mine?"

"Oh, I see what's happening here."

Ha... so that's what this was all about?

Wow, unbelievable.

I thought there was something more going on... turns out she's just a poor little lamb falling for my 95-point charm?

So this was all just a ploy to get my attention.

Now it all makes sense.

Of course, now I understand. Sniffing my uniform and calling me out with some lame harassment excuse—it was all because she liked me that much. Enough to confess in such a weird way.

Cute, really cute.

"Sigh. The price of being popular. That confession—"

"Yeah, be mine. I'll take good care of you."

"—What confession? Get lost, you crazy girl!"

Yeah, she really is nuts.

"Why? You don't want to?"

She looked genuinely confused.

"Of course not! Take care of me? What, are you raising me like a pet?"

"I’ll feed you, let you sleep at my place, and take care of you."

"......"

For a moment, I was tempted.

She’s dangerous...

"No thanks. I'm not a puppy. And besides, who in their right mind would date a girl who blackmails them with stuff like that?"

I tried to get up, but she grabbed my arm.

"Sit down."

"Let go of me."

"Sit down."

"I said no."

"...Why?"

She looked genuinely perplexed.

Is she serious?

"You're a virgin."

"..."

Should I kill her?

"I'm a virgin too."

If she's a virgin, I’ll let it slide.

In these unfortunate times when virginity has become a joke, a virgin—especially a ridiculously pretty one—is like a rare treasure. I should protect her.

"...Wait a minute. What did you just say?"

Did I hear her right?

"I'm a virgin too."

...I heard that correctly.

Is she really crazy?

"Stop lying, you b****!"

Almost fell for it.

"Lying? I'm telling the truth."

"You're seriously a virgin?"

Her innocent eyes almost made me believe her.

But no. This is the same girl who sneaked into the boys' locker room to sniff uniforms while getting off. There's no way a pervert like her could still be a virgin.

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